Successful Influencing
By Cheryl Speak, Striding Out Business Coach
Influencing skills are often hailed as the key to success and we are sometimes lead to believe that there is a ‘trick' to being a successful ‘influencer'. The truth is its simple .... Listening. The art is actually in knowing how to listen.
The reason why the simple art of listening is one of the strongest influencing skills is because it develops and enhances trust and rapport faster than anything else. In the world of sales, the more your client is telling you about themselves, then the more they build their trust in you.
Eventually, the more they will be convinced that you have their best interests as your primary goal and objective. You are not trying to push or lead a decision. To enhance your influencing skills, persuasion and to listen effectively, you have to be crystal clear regarding what you are listening for. In the case of sales or networking for example, you are listening to understand.
Effective listening is not a natural skill or ability and we can make it unnecessarily tough on ourselves. You make it difficult to listen whenever you do any of the following: begin to listen to another conversation that is happening somewhere else in a room, begin to think of what you are going to say next or how you are going to respond, drift off from the conversation and begin to think of other things, try to close a conversation down hoping for a quick sale, jump in to finish someone's sentence or assume you know what they are going to say next.
All these unnecessary distractions and sometimes irritating behaviours actually keep you from listening effectively. Effective listening isn't a technique in speed influencing. As you begin to listen and seek to understand, you are in fact helping your client / contact to discover and reveal. You are assisting them to reach their own conclusions and decisions guided by subtle questioning that helps them focus and concentrate.
As you develop and enhance your listening skills, you will notice that people begin to open up to you quicker, you feel a connection with people and it becomes a natural process rather than a technique you are mastering.
Prepare yourself to listen, relax and clear your mind of all the day to day ‘stuff' that is usually whirling round in your head. Know what your reason for listening is and be in a mind set of asking questions. When you take a genuine interest in others people talk more freely.
If you are looking to build long term relationships remember key points from the conversation and make a note of them. Taking an interest and demonstrating that you have listened and really paid attention will help others remember you.
If you would like some help developing your sales and influencing skills then you can use tap into the support of our business coaches, email us at [email protected] to find out more and discuss your needs.
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